How many years later - more than I like counting, and it's that same scenario. My birthday is the day before, Joe's is on Thanksgiving - and he's preparing the Capon that I have yet to convince my own family to cook for this holiday dinner. Small world problems. My birthday never falls on Thanksgiving, another year and I still don't get the Capon for dinner that my boss inspires me to want every year for the last 7 years.
None of those minor disappointments are anything to let get to me. I have had a lot of birthdays since that disappointing day when I learned about the third Thursday in November never being on my birthday. So what. I'll eat turkey and all the traditional things...at least the ones that I like of those offerings, with my family - and I'm glad to say I can do that, so what does it matter when we can all sit down for a nice meal together? There was once a time when we did that daily, and with more family members than I get to do these days. So let us eat, let us enjoy being at the table together - because this journey is too short on times when we get to do that.
A client asked me the other night if this birthday is a milestone - I guess in a typical sense of milestones, it's not - but it is one that carries a bit of weight to me. I'm thankful that I get to keep having birthdays, and doing so in good health. I don't feel my age, but I'm well aware of the fact that the calendar doesn't lie to me - or anyone else. Time is the river that keeps on flowing - never stopping, barely slowing and certainly never backing up for having missed anything along the way.
It's the along the way that we're responsible for making the most of. It's up to each one of us individually to live in these moments along the way - and I'm too often guilty of letting far too many of these moments pass me by. The unfortunate thing is that none of us are allowed to back track.
For years I've passed my former employer's farmhouse several times a week. I should point out that these employers were the parents behind a wonderful family that I worked with off and on for over ten years starting in 1991. When our time together started all those years ago, I had no idea that this would be employment that would be so meaningful - and to this very day, I say that I worked with these people rather than for them, because that's how they made me feel. I left my job with the Buchanan family a few times over the years to pursue other aspirations, they welcomed me back a few times - without question, each time treating me as if I'd never left. If they were still in business, I'd still be with them.
My point in bringing this up is that for all the times I've passed by Ralph & Joan Buchanan's house, I've never done so without remembering that they always told me to stop by any time I did that. Once when I was driving by, Mr. B. (I could never bring myself to call him Ralph - nor call Mrs. B. by her first name (Joan) - I just had too much respect for them) was at the mailbox. I immediately slowed down so that I could wave to him and make sure he knew it was me. The next time I saw him in person he remarked that the next time I simply drove by and waved at him, without stopping to visit, that he would be flipping me the bird as I drove by.
In the last two years, Mr. and Mrs. Buchanan have passed away. I still drive by their house several times a week, and every single time I do, I think of them and the wonderful memories I have of both of them. So many memories, all of which make me smile and warm my heart. Every single memory I have of those two makes me smile. Who gets to say that about people they worked for? How wonderful is that? Very, in my opinion. Very.
The difference in driving by their house now, hits me every time. I can't stop by now, and I want to - even just once. These are delightful people that I can no longer share a single moment with, and I never stopped to visit. They always told me to stop, and I know they meant it. Mr. B would've poured me a drink - or likely had me make us both one, and sit and talk for a bit. The house I never stopped at, to talk with people who made such an impact on my life, on my working life and in my life overall, aren't with us on this physical journey any more. The old farmhouse they called home isn't theirs now, having been sold a few weeks back.
Now when I drive by the house, along with my wonderful memories of two amazing people whom I loved and who loved me, I'm flooded with the fact that I should've stopped by, once, more than once...and how it makes me sad that I no longer have the option. I let the finite amount of opportunities I had slip away until the day came when I don't have the option. Shame on me. None of the reasons why I didn't stop by any of the times I drove by their house, makes any sense to me now...I was too busy, I couldn't just stop by unannounced - really? I knew these people well enough to know that if they didn't want me to stop by and visit with them, they would've told me to simply hit my horn and wave. While there were times when I was busy and on my way to something, the reality is that most of the times I drove by that house, I could have stopped - even if just for a moment to say hello, and they would've loved it. I would've too - I loved every moment I was in their presence.
So my thought going into this birthday/Thanksgiving week, is to stop by when I see the chance. To call when I'm thinking of someone, to reach out - even if it's only on social media, to anyone a good memory pops up about, to notice these opportunities to connect and act on them. This journey is much too short and we owe it to one another to act on these moments with anyone we love - because there will come a time when we no longer have the chance to do that....and most of us will think back and wish we'd done so any of the times we had the chance.
My hope going into this week is that we all act on more of these precious, but finite opportunities to connect with those who mean something to us, now, while we still have the chance. Reach out to one another, good people, and let those you love know without a doubt that they're loved. Peace, and may we all have a great week. Much love.
CRO
No comments:
Post a Comment